Pokimane Shuts Down An Obsessive Simp In Brutal Fashion

Simping Shut Down Pokimane
It was never going to happen bud | © Fox & Pokimane's Twitch

Pokimane is one of the biggest streamers in the world and so quite naturally, she has a lot of unwanted romantic requests. One poor simp wasn't expecting the beat down he got though, you almost feel sorry for the chump...

If you were to profess your love to someone and then they ignored you, and later laughed at you, how would you feel? That your most vulnerable moment was made the subject of ridicule? It would leave most of us broken.

Let this story be a lesson in simping: She will never love you. Just by being a Twitch fan who sends money to women online, you've made yourself significantly less attractive.

So stop, keep the money you've earned, or if you are going to spend it, then do so with the full knowledge that it will achieve nothing.

Beauty And The Beast; Pokimane And Her Simp

This tale involves our heroine Pokimane and one particular fan called knockoffvaseline. The user professed his love to Pokimane many months ago with this DM:

I'm kinda hoping that you won't see this. I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you so much, you have done so much for me and you don't even know it. You were there when nobody else was, you were there when nobody else cared. [...] I wanted to say thank you and I love you.

It's quite sweet, and so I hope for his sake he can sort his life out. But obviously, Pokimane ignored him. Perhaps bitter over the first message being ignored, his second DM a few months later was less gushing:

I'm pooping.

Well, it was this second message that Pokimane noticed. Not the first. And she didn't respond with love, she just found it funny:

The contrast between your two messages hahaha.

She's having some fun with it, and that's fine, obviously. But guys, what more do you expect when you send that stuff?

Here for a casual entertainment catch-up? Enjoy your stay, and why not take a browse:

Would Pokimane Ever Date A Fan?

So a lot of you are probably now wondering (and worrying), will Pokimane ever date a Twitch user or is she only interested in IRL chads? Clearly, she teases her fans:

But you don't want to be like this guy...

Luckily, we have some great news for you - Pokimane would date a fan! Or at least she claims she would if the situation was right. So don't give up hope just yet!

Do you worship at the altar of Pokimane? Let us know on Facebook or Twitter, and remember, you should consider joining MyEarlyGame today for exclusive tourneys and loads of great giveaways!

Jon Ramuz

Jon has a BA and an MA in English Literature, and as Content Lead for EarlyGame has written over 1,500 articles. He focuses on shooters, but also writes about entertainment and gaming in general....